Time enjoyed is never wasted.
That said, it could simply be this game isn't for you and it isn't time you are enjoying. If you want a more casual game that is easy to dabble in, perhaps something like The Forest? I mean, you don't really need a dedicated server there and since there is no anticheat you'd probably want a private server anyway. But that's a game where you can easily finish the story in about 2 hours if you know what to do, or you can simply hang out with friends building random crap and fighting cannibals as you please. Downside, host has to be on for the server to be up if it's not dedicated.
There's also potentially Games like Terraria. It takes a bit longer, more grind and a bit more rng at times but it's still a pretty reasonably casual game that can still have intense moments. Another you will probably play actively with friends rather than needing a dedicated server though. Depending on what games you do enjoy, I might have other suggestions, but atm all I know is you didn't like Valheim much.